Gawker rewrites that Page Six item

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Christopher Hitchens: The God That Failed

THEY don’t call him Christopher “Comical British Alcoholic” Hitchens =

for nothing. The warmonger, whose attempt to link his pro-conflict =

positions with the work of George Orwell offended the sensibilities =

of anyone who has ever read George Orwell, is at it again. “Hitch Is =

Not Great: How Everything In My Body Is Filled With Poison, =

Particularly My Liver” hits bookstores next month. The jeremiad, =

reports The Post’s Kyle Smith, is a merciless attack on everything =

Hitchens holds dear=97dryly called “absolutely fucking right” by its =

editor, Jonathan Karp, who is making it the second title in his new =

imprint, 12, because that’s how many vodkas he drank before deciding =

to publish Hitchens.

“I have retarded the development of civilization,” writes Hitchens; =

he goes on to call himself “a self-centered fantasist and an Scotch- =

centered ignoramus” and “a washed-up former Trotskyite who decided he =

wanted to be on the winning side for once and wound up advocating the =

biggest disaster in the history of U.S. foreign policy.” But the =

Hitch is just getting warmed up.

  • On Bush: ” ‘Bush is in the details?’ He isn’t in ours, unless his =

yokel creationist fans wish to take credit for his clumsiness, =

failure and incompetence.”

  • On his Slate columns: “I simply laugh when I read my Slate columns, =

with their endless obfuscations about yellowcake and their corrupt =

promise of a peaceful Middle East in the life to come.”

  • On his support for the conflict in Iraq: “A mask for a very deep =

and probably justifiable insecurity . . . not much more than a rather =

obvious and ill-arranged set of self-rationalizations, there is =

nothing - absolutely nothing - that can even begin to justify such =

arrogance.”

  • On women being taught to read: “The inculcation of compulsory =

stupidity.”

  • On Cheney: “A ‘fakir and guru’ whose belief in primitive =

intelligence meant that “hundreds of thousands of people have been =

maimed and wounded because his advice has been followed.”

  • On Colin Powell: “His absurd [speech to the U.N.] contained more =

lies than a two minute conversation with Ari Fleischer.”

  • On Bush again: “A hereditary king appointed by heaven itself. How =

convenient!”

  • On himself: “Commandingly authoritarian and bloody-minded” and =

given to “genocidal incitements.” Also “ready for another round, on =

someone’s expense account.” =97balk

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